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Chow Down on a Burger That Tastes Like Human Meat

You gotta ask yourself: how bad-ass do you want your Walking Dead premiere party to be? How far are you willing to go? Would you serve human flesh canapes? Then you should be arrested, but a collaboration between chefs in London have created a burger that has been carefully engineered to taste like human being.

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Studying the testimonies of famous cannibals. the expert chefs designed a patty that might taste like, in the words of journalist William Seabrook (who’ve actually has had it): “…good, fully developed veal, not young, but not yet beef. It was very definitely like that, and it was not like any other meat I had ever tasted. It was so nearly like good, fully developed veal that I think no person with a palate of ordinary, normal sensitiveness could distinguish it from veal. It was mild, good meat with no other sharply defined or highly characteristic taste such as for instance, goat, high game, and pork have. The steak was slightly tougher than prime veal, a little stringy, but not too tough or stringy to be agreeably edible. The roast, from which I cut and ate a central slice, was tender, and in color, texture, smell as well as taste, strengthened my certainty that of all the meats we habitually know, veal is the one meat to which this meat is accurately comparable.”

And here I always thought we were supposed to taste like sweet pork. Isn’t that why our meat has popularly been referred to as ‘long pig”? Maybe the islanders of Polynesia, where the term originated from, have a different taste.

Eventually, the culinary adventurers decided on, with the help of taste-testers, a mix of pork, veal, chicken livers and bone marrow, which presumes that other accounts of cannibals must have had some amount of variation to them. And what they handed out free to 250 contest winners in a restaurant in London was, to all accounts, a very tasty burger. Maybe the Donner party was onto something after all.

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